Practice : Coaching Conversations in 1:1s

Purpose and Strategic Importance

Coaching Conversations in 1:1s is the practice of using regular one-to-one meetings as a primary vehicle for individual growth, reflection, and development — rather than a status update or task management session. When leaders bring a coaching posture to these conversations, they help individuals think more clearly, develop more confidently, and build the capability to solve their own problems.

The shift from managing to coaching in 1:1s is one of the highest-leverage changes a leader can make. It builds trust, improves capability at the team level, and reduces dependency on the leader for direction. Over time, teams with coaches at their centre develop more leaders — and the organisation becomes less fragile.

Description of the Practice

  • 1:1 agendas are co-created; individuals own at least half the agenda.
  • Leaders practise active listening, powerful questioning, and reflective feedback.
  • Conversations regularly include development, growth goals, and longer-term aspirations.
  • The leader resists the impulse to advise and instead asks questions that develop the individual's own thinking.
  • Wellbeing, energy, and engagement are standing conversation topics alongside work.

How to Practise It (Playbook)

1. Getting Started

  • At the start of the next 1:1, ask: "What's most important to you that we talk about today?"
  • Replace "here's what I think you should do" with "what options do you see?" and "what would you try?"
  • Protect 1:1 time — reschedule rather than cancel, and treat it as a non-negotiable commitment.
  • Ask for feedback on the 1:1 itself: "Is this time valuable for you? What would make it better?"

2. Scaling and Maturing

  • Use a coaching framework like GROW (Goal, Reality, Options, Will) to structure deeper conversations.
  • Build a development log to track themes, goals, and progress over time.
  • Periodically zoom out from day-to-day topics to discuss career trajectory, strengths, and aspirations.
  • Share the coaching approach with peers — normalise it as a leadership practice, not a personal style.

3. Team Behaviours to Encourage

  • Individuals arrive to 1:1s with topics prepared, not waiting for the leader to set the agenda.
  • People feel safe to share challenges, doubts, and development struggles without fear of judgement.
  • Development goals emerge from and are tracked between 1:1s.
  • People take ownership of their growth and use the leader as a thinking partner, not a decision-maker.

4. Watch Out For…

  • 1:1s that are consistently dominated by operational updates — the leader is managing, not coaching.
  • Leaders who give answers before exploring the individual's own thinking.
  • Cancelled or perpetually shortened 1:1s — these signal that the individual is not a priority.
  • 1:1s that feel evaluative rather than developmental — this closes down honest conversation.

5. Signals of Success

  • Individuals solve more problems independently, using the leader as a sounding board rather than an answer machine.
  • People report that 1:1s are a highlight of their working week — genuinely useful and energising.
  • Development goals are set, revisited, and progressed — not created and forgotten.
  • The leader hears candid feedback and difficult truths that they would not have heard in a different environment.
  • The relationship between leader and individual deepens in a way that supports long-term performance.